The Life I Want: How Would You Rewrite the Rules of Work?
Pandemic lessons, financial trauma, and one man's search for meaningful work
Harvest time at ATR Wines. Eva wrote about her life and work, including her family’s wine business, during the pandemic. (Photo by @artisanalphoto.)
On December 31, 2019, the two of us met at The Haven, a co-working space in Bend, Oregon, to flesh out our plan for this project. The Haven is carefully curated, with Deschutes River views, funky lamps and practical whiteboards, the requisite free-flowing kombucha and organic snacks, and gender-inclusive restrooms. A selfie wall with neon pink lettering invites you to Make magic happen!
But a few months after our day at The Haven, the pandemic laid waste to that too-perfect vision of work, showing how precarious it was in the first place.
At The Haven, we did a little white-boarding to identify the tenets that society embraces about work: “My work is my identity.” “If I work hard enough, my job will give me everything I need.” We reflected on how poorly these “rules” have served us, and wondered what it would look like to replace them.
How would you rewrite the rules of work?
Here, we’re sharing our recent stories on that theme—and extending an invitation for you to share your thoughts with us during our next community call.
Our first story is an essay from Eva, who reflects on her stages of the pandemic—from her initial burst of energy, to conflict within her family under the pressures of lockdown, to a recognition that following the rules of the “rugged individualist” doesn’t work. Now she’s finding ways to live and work in community.
Our next piece, by Christine, looks at rewriting the rules around money and wealth. Today, the dominant narratives about money are harmful: that your net worth equals your value to society, and that you alone are responsible for your financial fate—never mind the systemic racism and other trauma that makes the playing field decidedly not level. Debunking those narratives is Chloe McKenzie, self-proclaimed “wealth equalizer” and founder of the Center on Financial Trauma and Wealth Justice. Looking at her own life, including her years working in finance, McKenzie realized that that industry is perpetuating what she came to label “financial trauma.” She launched BlackFem, a financial empowerment program for Black girls that teaches them not just the basics of money but how to intervene in monetary systems. McKenzie is on a mission to get us all “to stop thinking of ourselves as units of wealth and units of productivity, and start thinking about our lives in a much more whole, conscious way.”
Donovan Ervin is up for that challenge. Ervin talked to Eva about how he flipped the script on the job search, using his career transition as an opportunity for self-discovery. Ervin graduated from Yale with two master's degrees last spring, and is on a quest for meaningful work and a life that matters. As one of just 15 Black students of the 500 in both of his programs, he feels added pressure to honor “the gravity of this moment.” But neither does he want to give his whole self to work at the expense of friends, family, and community: “How do I love myself enough to do the things that bring me to life, that bring me energy—that allow the power to flow through me so that my cup is being filled and I’m able to serve others meaningfully?” The questions he’s holding may resonate with many of you.
How would you rewrite the rules of work in your life, and in society more broadly? We’ll discuss this in our third community call, on May 4, at 4 p.m. Pacific Standard Time / 7 p.m. Eastern Standard Time (5 May at 9 a.m. Australian Eastern Standard Time). To join us, fill out this short form. We’ve also created an unlisted LinkedIn group for all of us to share articles and musings, so please do join us there as well.
Other stuff:
We’ll be tuning into Work Shouldn’t Suck’s Ethical Re-Opening Summit April 27, and taking part in Global Intrapreneur Week June 7-11.
We shed tears at the passing of Beverly Cleary, just shy of her 105th (!) birthday. We could all take life lessons from Cleary’s character Ramona Quimby: “She was not a slowpoke grownup. She was a girl who could not wait. Life was so interesting, she had to find out what happened next.”
Christine has just taken on the chairpersonship of McMinnville, Oregon’s new Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion Advisory Committee, whose purpose is to make policy and program recommendations to City Council and staff. We see the DEI agenda as critical to creating a better future of work and life, and would welcome connections with anyone doing comparable work.
In the wake of the Atlanta hate crimes and the rise of anti-Asian violence over the past year, this conversation between Maura Hohman and Melea McCreary about being a “white passing” half-Filipina resonated deeply with Christine, who identifies the same way. If you’re searching for what you can do to fight harassment and racism, Hollaback!’s free one-hour trainings are excellent.
In rethinking work, we talk a lot about what that means to rethink our work: How can we tell stories with people rather than extracting stories from them? We appreciated this conversation with podcaster Connie Walker about the difference between “storytelling” and “story taking.” Walker puts this into practice in her podcast Finding Cleo, about a Cree family’s search for a sister who disappeared after being taken by Canada’s child welfare system and adopted into a U.S. family.
We’ve got two articles in the pipeline, on healthcare equity and how young people are looking at the future of work, and we’d love to get your thoughts and questions on those topics. We also welcome your ideas for people and organizations to profile. Please get in touch anytime at hello@thelifeiwant.co, or find us both on Twitter (@EvaDienel and @christinebader).
Until soon,
Eva & Christine